Fear Is Destructive
Regular readers will have noticed that msquill has been down for a few weeks. Those of you who know me personally can probably figure out why, but for the rest of you, it’s a long, involved story that I won’t get into here.
Suffice it to say that I let fear of what “might happen” get in the way of what I love. I let fear of what “could happen” over-ride my common sense and good judgment. In truth, I allowed fear to run my life for a bit. It happens to everyone at some point, right?
With a lot of prayer, and good bit of meditation, and equally as much discussion I’ve decided that I’m not going to let fear of what “might” dictate what I do and who I am. Letting fear control things isn’t good for my health, my peace of mind, or my future, and it’s a bad example for my children, as well. In general I’m not a fearful person. I try to live my life centered on Spirit, and my spiritual path.. note I said TRY. I’m the first to admit that I mess up on occasion– sometimes frequently. These last few weeks have been one of those times. I stubbornly tried to convince my family and friends that I was justified in setting msquill to private, but really what I was doing was giving in to fear.
Fear does that.. it takes over, it convinces us that we should act in ways that we know in our heart is not for our greatest Good. And then, while we’re acting in ways counter to our best interests, the ego convinces us that we’re right. Because that’s what ego does.. tells you that you have to be right.
In reality, what I did was give in to fear of a situation that had only occurred in my head. The risk I fear is legitimately there, don’t get me wrong. And to be honest, I’m still afraid of that risk. But, the truth is that the risk is minimal. And the Truth is that Spirit/God is bigger than the thing I fear. I temporarily forgot that. I got caught up in the earthly situation and forgot to look at God *in* the situation.
If you think I’m being cryptic, I probably am. Just know that I’m back, and I’m done letting fear control my actions. If you’re reading this, then please.. use my recent struggle with fear as a jumping point to examine your own relationship with fear. Are you allowing fear to color your reactions, actions or feelings about a situation in your life?
Like I tell my kids…”Don’t make the same mistakes I did, make your own mistakes.” I’ve just make this one, so you don’t have to.